"Yesterday is history, and tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift, and that's why it's called the present."
- dunno
I saw Bee Movie recently, and although Jerry Seinfeld wrote it and had a major role, the only line I remember from the entire movie came from a secondary character:
"Why does yogurt night have to be so difficult?"
"Have as good a night as you can."
- store clerk
"The Original - If your grandfather hadn't worn it, you wouldn't exist."
That made me laugh out loud in the grocery store.
Shin: A tool for finding furniture in the dark.
"Good things come to those who wake."
"Forgiveness is between them and God. It's my job to arrange the meeting."
- Denzel Washington's character in Man On Fire
"The Simpson not only jumped the shark, they killed the shark, ate the shark, shit the shark back into the ocean and jumped the shit."
Random (non YouTube) video about the evolution of the sitcom.
"Come to the Dark Side ... we have cookies."
"Sometimes I miss my own point."
- me
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